A God that kills children.

Possibly one could argue: it is not god's fault, God didn't mean it. God had a greater purpose.

But we are often left with the harsh reality of the world and our questions for God unanswered.

A reason for anger at God? Yes.

A reason for believing God is not there? Not so much.

Harsh realities that are uncomfortable, unbearable, unexplainable, exist in many "belief systems"

One believes there is no God, all is chance. Harsh reality: nothing has any ultimate meaning, all our greatest achievements, dreams, concepts, all a complex joke. Or in the words of my professor of developmental biology: "a hen is only an egg's way of making another egg."

Realities that break apart our concepts of truth are not by any means uncommon. The Jew loses his faith in light of witnessing the holocaust. The atheist cannot maintain disbelief in light of the horrors of Stalin. I am more and more convinced that if i were to truly learn, day by day, all of the realities of the universe, experience the joys and horrors of all of human existence, i could easily lose my faith in just hours, gain it back in a few more, over and over and over.

How to go on? I fall at the feet of my God for mercy.